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The crime bill passed by the Senate would reinstate the Federal death penalty for certain violent crimes: assassinating the President; hijacking an airliner; and murdering a government poultry inspector.

- Knight-Ridder News Service dispatch

A Police Officer seen two old ladies sitting in a vehicle in a used car lot late at night. The oficer approached them and asked what they were doing? The old ladies said they just bought this vehicle. The Police Officer said to them, 'why don't you just drive it away'. The old ladies told the officer that their friends said if we buy a car here, we'd get 'screwed'.